Evaporated
by KatsyKat
Summary: This idea popped into my head while I was trying to work, and wouldn't let me go until I wrote it down. Featuring your favorite and mine, Heero Yuy!


Well, I'm sitting at work one day, bored out of my mind and see what happens. I've had the worst case of writer's block and this came sneaking up on me when I was listening to one of my old CD's by Ben Folds Five. It's a good one called, Whatever and Ever Amen if you ever get a chance to listen to it.  
  
Now this is a song fic, (My very FIRST one!!! YEA!) based on the last song on the album (why do people still call them albums?) called Evaporated, and when I was listening to it, I couldn't get Heero out of my head. It just seemed to fit him to perfectly. So. here it is. Oh and PLEASE don't be too harsh, I did this in a few hours between approving invoices.  
  
Oh and I don't claim to own anything about Gundam Wing, (except almost all of the manga) or any of the lyrics by Ben Folds Five. I only own this little ficcy here. So there.  
  
Evaporated  
  
Song By: Ben Folds Five Fanfiction By: KatsyKat  
  
~~If it's inside these nifty marks ~~ = song lyrics [ ] = These marks mean that I'm either not sure of the word(s) or I added it to make sense.]  
  
The Date is After Colony 199. Heero stands in the middle of a room. It is completely bare, save the neatly-made cot in the corner, a television on a dresser across the room, and a small army green backpack propped on the bed next to a laptop in a over the shoulder black leather carrying case. Despite the fact that he is leaving, the apartment (if it can be called that) looks no different than it did 20 minutes before he started packing his few belongings.  
  
~~What I've kept with me, and what I've thrown away.~~  
  
Heero shrugs on the back pack and grabs his laptop. Locking the door behind him, he starts walking towards the beach, where the sun is setting, but is hidden by the many clouds cluttering the sky line.  
  
~~and where the hell I've ended up on this bleary random day.~~  
  
Heero reaches the beach and walks up to the water. He is perhaps 15 feet from the water when he steps on a pile of sea foam. He looks down at his feet briefly and then back up to the water line. More foam jumps from the sea to scurry across the beach. Even as he takes a step, the foam catches a breeze and is off.  
  
~~Where the things I really cared about, just left along the way,~~ ~~for being to pent up and proud.~~  
  
Heero closes his eyes briefly as if to stop the flashback of Relena leaving him. The fact that he was now on the same beach didn't help. She had turned, her hair fluttering like the foam in the wind, the sunlight reflecting off of the unshed tears in her eyes like the glare of the sunset off the ocean, as she turned from him for the first and the last time; finally giving up on him. Perhaps it was fate that it all ended on the very same beach that it all began.  
  
~~Woke up way to late, feeling hung over and old.~~  
  
Heero set down the laptop and his bag, which felt as if it had suddenly gained 20 pounds. He sat for a moment, removing his shoes "who wears shoes on a beach anyway?" he could recall Relena saying. Then, as if just thinking about her voice could do such a thing, the clouds parted and a ray of sunlight poked through, giving the beach one last burst of warmth before night set in.  
  
And the sun was shining bright, as I walked barefoot down the road.  
  
Heero turned from the beach, too many memories flooded him there. As he looked up to the street and saw an ambulance meandering down the road (no near-deaths, no hurry), At the sight of the ambulance, two memories flooded his mind.  
  
~~Started thinking 'bout my old man, it seems it all [ends,]~~ ~~when I get into the car and go. anywhere.~~  
  
The first is of the assassin, the only father figure that Heero ever had being carried away in an ambulance, slowly. He was dead (no near-deaths, no hurry). The second memory is of a time much more recent than that, when a passing girl who thought he was hurt called an ambulance to help him.  
  
Heero gets as far as the top of the stairs before he looks down on the beach through the fence. More memories, many of Relena, overlap each other much like the ocean. Some crest and play out, while many others simply blend into one another. With his mind racing, he stands as still as a statue, except for his hair which is being tousled by the ocean breeze.  
  
~~Here I stand, Sad and Free.~~ ~~I can't cry. [But] I can see,~~  
  
Heero grabs the wire fence as if hanging on to the edge of a cliff. He lowers his head as if he is too ashamed to look directly at beauty of the ocean.  
  
~~what I've done.~~ ~~No god, what have I done?~~  
  
Hearing a noise, Heero raises his head slowly and sees Duo approaching him. Heero lowers his hands from the fence, but otherwise remains perfectly still, as if afraid Duo will know what he is thinking. Duo walks up much more solemnly than usual. But Heero couldn't care less.  
  
~~Don't you know I'm numb, and now I can't feel a thing at all?~~ ~~'Cause it's all smiles and business these days, and I'm indifferent to the loss.~~  
  
Heero couldn't believe Duo was being so damn quiet. A smile only crossed his face briefly in greeting, but was gone long before he handed Heero a very official looking envelope. Heero paused a moment staring at if as if not comprehending. Finally, after a few moments, he took it and put it in his pocket without reading it. Duo shrugged, as if it was none of his business, and left without saying a single word.  
  
Long after Duo had gone, Heero began to walk again. He wasn't conscious of going any specific way or to any specific place; he was just walking and trying to clear his head.  
  
~~And I think that there's a song somewhere, and it's leading me around,~~  
  
He walked for a long time and when he finally stopped  
  
~~I wonder if she knows which way is down?~~  
  
he was directly below Relena's house. No, not just her house, but her bedroom. It was now dusk. The sun struggled to stay above the horizon now that the clouds had finally given way, but the false warmth of the sunset was already fading into the chill of night.  
  
~~Here I stand, Sad and Free.~~  
  
Heero looked up at her window. She had turned on the light. The yellow light from her window lit up her curtains, but she was nowhere to be seen. 'Perhaps that's for the best' thought Heero as he looked back to the beach.  
  
~~I can't cry. [But] I can see,~~ ~~what I've done.~~ ~~No god, what have I done?~~  
  
Under Heero's gaze, the sea foam tumbled joyously from the ocean's protective grasp. How is it something so simple as letting go, could be so hard?  
  
~~Not poured my heart out.~~  
  
Why was it he could never tell her what she meant to him. And every time instead of getting easier, it got harder. Heero watched the sea foam race away from the ocean, getting smaller and smaller each time it tumbled over itself. But the foam on the ocean was getting smaller and smaller too.  
  
~~Not poured my heart out.~~ ~~It evaporated.~~  
  
Heero blinked.  
  
~~See?~~  
  
Heero closed his eyes, knowing that nothing can make up for the past. There can be only the future.  
  
~~Blind man on a [kaymen's] edge of a panoramic scene.~~ ~~Maybe I'm the kind that's flying high [and random dangling a string]~~  
  
For a moment, Heero vividly remembered flying Wing Zero: the blurred lines of reality and the lack of definition between the present, past, and future.  
  
~~Or slumped over in a vacant room, head on a strangers knee.~~  
  
Before he could recover from that flashback he was standing before a bleeding little girl. There was a click. The gun in his hand had fired, seemingly against his will and as he heard his raspy voice he was suddenly dropping the gun and. falling. But he never hit the ground.  
  
~~I'm sure back home they think I've lost my mind.~~  
  
As vivid as the last two, a final memory flashed through his head. The betrayal of the Gundam pilots by the colonists. How they were betrayed, feared, and finally hated by the people they were striving to protect.  
  
Heero ran a hand through his hair. Making a decision, he reached into his pocket and withdrew the envelope that Duo had given him. He tore it open carefully, removing the pages from within. With one last look at Relena's now-darkened window, he flipped past the first page, the word DIVORCE jumping out at him, and withdrew a pen from his pocket. He signed his name at the bottom of the last page and next to it, wrote Gomen, Aishiteru. He replaced the papers, withdrew the ring from his finger, put them both in the envelope provided in the letter and sealed it.  
  
~~Here I stand, Sad and Free.~~ ~~I can't cry. [But] I can see,~~ ~~what I've done.~~ ~~No god, what have I done?~~  
  
That done, he turned from her for the last time. He knew he could never give her what she wanted, and at the same time he could never deny her anything she wanted. And so he would not deny her this, because it allowed her to be free to find what she was looking for.  
  
As the sun disappeared completely from the sky, and the day was claimed by night, Heero Yuy walked back the way he had come along the beach, being careful not to step on any more sea foam.  
  
~[The End]~  
  
  
  
SO. there it is. PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW!!! I think it's kinda cheesy, but please e-mail me: katsykatherine@hotmail.com. I love hearing what others think.  
  
Oh, and, for any of you who are following, or care to follow my fic Alone the writers block had me in it's clutches, but the next chapter has finally broken free, and after a few (very few) revisions, I will be posting it. Yea!  
  
Ja-ne for now!! KatsyKat ^'.'^ 


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